Mary Martin Tobias

Our beloved Sister Mary Martin Tobias, 89, died peacefully at 8:16 a.m., Thursday, November 28, 2013, in Notre Dame Health Care, Our Lady of Good Counsel, Mankato, Minnesota. Her death on Thanksgiving Day echoed her life of gratitude: "I want you to know of my deep gratitude to the School Sisters of Notre Dame for all that has been given me."

The funeral Mass for Sister Mary Martin, with Father Ted Hottinger, S.J., as presider, will be at 10:30 a.m., Wednesday, December 4, in Good Counsel Chapel. Sister Mary Martin had requested that her body be cremated immediately after death; her cremains will be buried in our cemetery following the Mass on Wednesday. The vigil service will be at 7:00 p.m. on Tuesday, December 3. We extend our sympathy to her cousins, her friends, her former students and colleagues, and her sisters in community, the School Sisters of Notre Dame. She was preceded in death by her parents, Emil and Mary (Clemens) Tobias, and her sister, Frances.

Sister Mary Martin was born May 19, 1924, in Red Wing, Minnesota, and baptized Patricia Jane at St. Joseph Church on June 8. Patsy, as she was called, and her sister Frances, four years older, grew up in a loving family environment. Sister Mary Martin wrote, "My parents were faith-filled people, setting us an example in our earliest years of love for God, strong faith, and a generous concern for others. An outstanding trait I witnessed in my parents was their generosity and kindness toward each other. We had a very close and happy family life. My parents loved children and always regretted that they did not have more children, but they were very grateful that God had blessed them with two daughters."

Patsy attended St. Joseph School for eight years, beginning in 1930. "The School Sisters of Notre Dame were my teachers and friends." Before her graduation from eighth grade in 1938, she faced more adversity than some people experience in a lifetime. In early 1934, Frances died suddenly as a result of a burst appendix. Two and one-half years later, in September 1936, her mother, who had been an invalid for about three years, died. Fourteen months later, in December 1937, cancer claimed the life of her father. Sister Mary Martin later wrote about this time in her life, "This, too, was very difficult for me " to lose all three in so short a time. My father prepared me for this in a mature and sensible way. He taught me many lessons in his last months of life, lessons of values and living faith in action."

Patsy moved to Prescott, Wisconsin, in June 1938, after her eighth grade graduation, to live with her mother's sister, Frances Clemens. Sister Mary Martin described this next stage of life, "My aunt was a woman of great integrity, courage " and was in every way a truly valiant woman. Together we made adjustments and lived a simple, frugal life " never in want, but we experienced what it meant to be brought low. Her prayer life, her sense of humor, her high ideals were the inspiration that kept me growing in God's ways. I owe everything to this woman. She was very proud that I chose religious life and was willing to do without and face loneliness and great poverty rather than allow me to stay at home."

When Patsy graduated from Prescott High School in 1942, she "felt a very strong call to follow Jesus and to be part of the ministry of the School Sisters of Notre Dame." She entered the candidature in August, taking college courses in preparation for teaching. As a second-year candidate, she taught primary grades at SS. Peter & Paul School, Mankato. She was received into the novitiate in July 1944 and given the name Sister Mary Martin. Following first profession in July 1945, she began twenty-nine years of teaching and administration in several Catholic schools in Minnesota and North Dakota. She taught primary grades at St. Francis de Sales, St. Paul (1945-1953) and earned a B.A. from the College of St. Catherine in 1951. She continued as a primary teacher at St. John, Mankato (1953-54) and St. Agnes, St. Paul (1954-57). In 1957, she helped open St. Anne School, Bismarck, North Dakota, and stayed for four years. As teacher and principal, she opened another new school, St. Mary of the Lake, Plymouth, Minnesota, in 1961. In 1967 she returned to Bismarck where she was principal for three years. Her final Catholic School experience was as principal, first of Sacred Heart, and then of Sacred Heart-St. John, St. Paul (1969-74), where one of her major tasks was the consolidation of Sacred Heart with St. John. A recent comment on an SSND website testified to Sister Mary Martin's effectiveness in the school setting: "Sister Mary Martin, I don't really need a response but I wanted to thank you for all you did to make my life immensely better. I remember the first day I walked into St. Mary's (late) as a 6th grader. You came walking up to me with a bounce in your step and welcomed me by name as a new student. I felt so special."

In 1972, Sister Eunice Silkey, the provincial leader, invited Sister Mary Martin to work with her on plans for activities and education for retired sisters. She studied gerontology in the succeeding summers, and in 1974 she became the province retirement director. She focused her energy on helping retired sisters remain as active as possible, and began PEP (Personal Enrichment Program) as a means to accomplish this. Classes and activities on many subjects were offered for senior sisters. Sisters with a wide variety of skills were enlisted to share their talents with others. In addition, Sister Mary Martin conducted workshops on aging, grief and other topics for the province. She began programs with the more infirm sisters of Marian Hall to keep them engaged as well. Sister Mary Martin also helped revitalize the Interprovincial Health and Aging Committee. In 1978, she became director of the Good Counsel Health Care Center and continued her many-faceted work with retired sisters.

In 1984, while still director of SSND retirement, Sister Mary Martin began pastoral care and grief work at Queen of Peace Hospital, New Prague. She was also a presenter in the hospital's education programs. During her four years at Queen of Peace, Sister Mary Martin's impact was keenly felt. In 1988, the hospital's newsletter, Peace Profile, headlined her open house farewell gathering article, "Teaching, Caring, Sharing . . . The many facets of Sister Mary Martin." The article stated, "When Sister Mary Martin was asked upon her arrival at Queen of Peace what she enjoyed most, she answered, "I enjoy LIFE!' And that wonderful lady, with the radiant smile and sparkling eyes, helped others find that joy in life by offering advice on making choices, taking risks " changing, growing. Sister Mary Martin helped people enrich their own lives by enriching the lives of loved ones." She was instrumental in developing the Hope through Sharing Program and the hospital's Hospice program.

Sister Mary Martin became the SSND pre-retirement director in 1988, living at Sacred Heart in St. Paul and exploring alternate housing for semi-retired sisters. As part of this program, Sisters moved to Central Towers and a house on Prior Avenue in St. Paul, or Regina in Hastings. The Prior Avenue house was very close to St. Mary's Home, and that led to Sister Mary Martin's next ministry " pastoral care and mission integration at St. Mary's Home, which she began in 1989. Again she focused on making elderly people's last years as meaningful as possible. She described her years at St. Mary's as "grace-filled, happy years, especially because of journeying with the dying through Hospice." In recognition of her work at St. Mary's, she earned the Sisters of St. Francis Healthcare Achievement Award in 1996. Staff members, residents and family members all attested to her loving care, especially in the area of spiritual preparation.

In 2003, Sister Mary Martin came to Good Counsel, supposedly to retire. She stayed active, "finding time for community service, more opportunities for prayer, time for leisure and for renewing friendship with my sisters." Drawing on her experience at St. Mary's, she suggested and helped implement the highly successful Mission Integration Program at Good Counsel. Sisters and staff meet quarterly to share the SSND vision and mission.

In September 2013, Sister Mary Martin was diagnosed with incurable pancreatic cancer, and she suddenly found herself on the "other side" of the Hospice program with which she had so much experience. In her final months she continued to express gratitude for her blessings, as she looked forward to that "wonderful "Going Home.'" May Sister Mary Martin now fully enjoy the "Home" she so longed for these last days, giving eternal praise and thanks to God for her blessings!